DISTINCTION TUTORIAL SCHOOL - Descriptive Writing

Describing a Place
Describing a Person
Describing an Event/Experience

The goal of descriptive writing is to paint a vivid word picture either to inform or to entertain. The focus of the description could be person / people, thing(s), place or experience. A good description allows the readers to visualize and hence engage in a vicarious experience. Consider the following examples written by some well known professional writers:

I. Describing a Place

"The Ridley Place jutted into a sharp curve beyond our house. Walking south, one faced its porch; the sidewalk turned and ran beside the lot. The house was low, was once white with a deep front porch and green shutters, but had long ago darkened to the colour of the slate-grey yard around it. Rain-rotted shingles* dropped over the eaves of the verandah; oak trees kept the sun away. The remains of a picket drunkenly guarded the front yard- a "swept" yard that was never swept – where Johnson grass and rabbit –tobacco grew in abundance."

(excerpted from "To Kill a Mockingbird" by Harper Lee" )

shingles- wood pieces on roof

slate - dark grey rock

picket – fence made of pointed wooden sticks

Questions:

1. What is your impression of the Ridley Place?

Elegant
Grand
Run-down (dilapidated)
Modern

2.What is the mood of the Ridley Place?

Bright and cheery
Depressing
Threatening
Romantic

3.Underline the details which led to your conclusion in Qn 1 & 2

If you have thought that the Ridley Place is in a state of disrepair (dilapidated) with a depressing mood then you have followed the description of the picture. Some details which have conjured the impression and the mood include:

(1) "once white… but now darkened into the colour of …"

(2) "rain-rotted shingles dropped over"

(3) "oak tree kept the sun away"

(4) "remains of a picket drunkenly guarded

(5) " a swept yard that was never swept

(6) "where johnson grass and rabbit-tobacco grew in abundance"

(referring to some wild grass growing unchecked)

Return to the excerpt and you would notice that the author

states in the first sentence what is to be described

gives a number of concrete details

organises the details

Vocabulary

Notice the use of vivid adjectives, strong verbs and adverbs: not just shingles but "rain-rotted shingles"; not "lay" but "drooped"; not "picket guarded" but "picket drunkenly guarded. The last description conjures up, metaphorically, the image of a sloppy, slouching soldier untidily attired who could barely stand upright for his duty.

Back to top

II. Describing a Person

Here’s a description by the well-loved children’s author Roald Dahl:

" Mr Twit was one of these very hairy-faced men. The whole of his face except for his forehead, his eyes and his nose, was covered with thick hair. The stuff even sprouted in revolting tufts out of his nostrils and ear-holes. Mr Twist felt that his hairiness made him look terrifically wise and grand. But in truth he was neither of these things. Mr Twit was a twit. He was born a twit. And now at the age of sixty, he was a bigger twit than ever. The hair on Mr Twit’s face didn’t grow smooth and matted as it does on most hairy-faced men. It grew in spikes that stuck out straight like the bristles of a nailbrush. And how often did Mr Twit wash his bristly nailbrush face of his? The answer is NEVER, not even on Sundays. He hadn’t washed it for years."

(Excerpted from "The Twits" by Roald Dahl)

Questions
1. What impression do you have of Mr Twit?

handsome and dashing

very well groomed

dignified

filthy and disgusting

2. Underline and number all the details which support your answer in question one.

There can be no question that any of us will ever want to sit beside Mr Twit on an MRT train. We shall certainly give him a wide berth and move on to the next compartment. So you see, Roald Dahl had in his mind to create a loathsome character which he wanted the readers to greatly dislike. In describing a character, we need to evoke an emotional response in the readers.

Notice how Roald Dahl began with the physical appearance and he knew, naturally, the readers will come to a conclusion about the qualities of the character. It is most legitimate to describe him as "vain (he thought he looked wise and imposing", "hopelessly lazy (what other reason is there that a person can have that awful degree of personal neglect?")

Thus Roald Dahl concentrated in that paragraph to build up the character of Mr Twit, supplied convincing details and organised them spatially. He started from the top of Mr Twit’s face before homing in on his beard – the dominant feature.

For character description, there is no need to be exhaustive. Rather, concentrate on some aspects of the character’s features and then supply enough vivid details to make them memorable, or if these are unsavoury, then grudgingly - unforgettable.

For characters, make them authentic, that is believable.

How about you try describing the physical appearance and qualities of a person you truly admire?

Back to top
III. Describing an event / experience

The key to describing an event/ experience is still to have a focus. Hence, it is important for you to have a thesis statement at the end of the introductory paragraph to state the main point of your description. We cannot afford to drift from one point to another aimlessly and risking boring our readers.

Below is an excerpt from "Charlotte’s Web by E. B. White" about the power of expectation.

"Wilbur was now the centre of attraction on the farm. Good food and regular hours were showing results: Wilbur was a pig any man would be proud of . One day more than a hundred people came to stand at his yard and admire him. Charlotte had written the word RADIANT, and Wilbur really looked radiant as he stood in the golden sunlight. Ever since the spider had befriended him, he had done his best to live up to his reputation. When Charlotte’s web said SOME PIG, Wilbur had tried hard to look like some pig. When Charlotte’s web said TERRIFIC, Wilbur had tried to look terrific. And now that the web said RADIANT, he did everything possible to make himself glow."

Usually, we describe an experience chronologically ie. according to the order of happening in time.

Do make sure that the sequence of events have a central theme so that the details cohere (fit together to form a united whole)

Plan on paper the dominant theme eg. the power of expectations and then use specific characters and details to flesh out the theme.

Now making use of the above pointers, describe an experience whereby quick thinking by the protagonist(s) saved the day.

Using Similes and Metaphors

Use of figures of speech spices up your writing, making it deliciously interesting by comparing the details you are describing to something well known, thus teasing the readers’ imagination.

Similes make use of these two words: "like" and "as" whereas metaphors make a direct comparison without using those words.

Examples

Similes

Like a ravenous wolf deprived of a proper meal for a whole month, he almost gobbled up the entire buffet spread.

She was as tightly wrapped as a chinese dumpling in the undersized red cheongsam that screamed attention.

Metaphors

Beneath the benign façade, he was actually a wolf in sheep’s skin.

"My love, you are the pure white lily who have enraptured me!"

Do collect well-crafted similes and metaphors as you read

Back to top